Saturday, April 2, 2016

How To Do Conflict Well (aka Don't be an A-hole)

I've been teaching classes/mini workshops lately regarding communication, because I believe it's the #1 most important aspect of a healthy relationship. One of the things I focus on is how to do conflict well. I want to clarify some things that may be keeping you from thinking you will benefit from such content! Several people have asked me this question:
**What does it mean when you say you're going to teach us how to "Do Conflict Well"? Isn't conflict bad and something to be avoided?**
The short answer is: conflict is not bad, and it needn't be feared, much less avoided. The primary purpose of the class is to reframe "conflict", moving it from "something to be feared/avoided" to simply "an issue to be resolved". The secondary purpose is to give practical tips and strategies for how to handle conflict when it inevitably arises, or how to start the conversations you need to have without fear of the conflict escalating. "A resolution everyone can live with" is the ultimate goal of any conflict, whether that resolution means setting it aside for a moment (or forever), or finding complete agreement, or compromising.
It may sound counterintuitive, but in fact, many healthy relationships contain a great deal of conflict. Any time you put strong personalities together, you're likely to have disagreements and reach impasses. My goal is to teach you how to do that gracefully, with respect and love, in such a way that your relationship is not damaged by it. In other words, how to do conflict well, and not be an a-hole.
The classes are interactive, but if you're a shy person, you don't have to say anything if you don't want to. I'm (obviously) super informal, so you can kind of have an idea of what to expect based on how I write and speak in regular life. I have prepared a handout that we work from that includes 30 or so specific, practical tips & tools for fighting fairly.
Anyway, I just wanted to give some more background on that class because people who are unfamiliar with my counseling style may not be inclined to sign up for a class with me, but I promise you'll enjoy it and get something useful out of it. smile emoticon
Holler at me if you want more info or to enroll. Full pay required to hold spot, and class is capped at 8 people.

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